Kickers are the ultimate Taco Bell fart...can't trust 'em.


Now that yet another offensive tackle is out for the year, look for GM Rick Spielman to sign a tractor tire inner tube to fill the void.

As a defensive player, if you've never been chopped down at the legs by a tractor tire inner tube...you've never...ah...well, never been...where the hell am I going with this?

Anyway, back in the glory days of backyard football out at Howard Weckworth's place, Camel, Skeddy, and I would utilize a tractor tire inner tube as a blocker. Defenders come barreling at you, you simply drop that inner tube in front of them at their legs and watch them hit the frozen turf while you scamper for another 8 yards. If they gouge themselves on the valve stem, it's an "unsportsmanlike conduct penalty" and the gain is nullified.

Anyway....look for Tractor Tire Inner Tube in jersey #71 on the Vikings sideline, just waiting for an opportunity.

SKOLS!